Max Whitlock: “It would eat me up inside if I stopped because I was scared of failing in Paris.”

“I’d never felt like that before,” said British artistic gymnast Max Whitlock in an exclusive interview with Olympics.com ahead of his first competition back since Tokyo 2020, the Scottish Championships on Saturday 17 and Sunday 18 February.

The three-time Olympic champion was detailing his mental health struggles since the Japan Games ended in August 2021, something he’d not experienced at two previous editions.

“A lot of athletes talk about the low after Olympic Games and I never could even comprehend it or even relate to it at all, but now I really can. I can really relate to that feeling of being completely lost, just struggling constantly.”

At his home Games at London 2012, nothing was expected of the 19-year-old – who had not even competed at a World Championships at that point – except gaining experience. Instead, the teenager came away with two bronze medals – one in the team competition in which Britain’s men won the first Olympic team medal in exactly 100 years, and a sensational third place on pommel horse. Thrilled with his performance, it took Whitlock just three weeks to return to the gym.

Riding high

At Rio 2016, Whitlock became the first British gymnast to win Olympic gold, claiming the title not only on his specialist apparatus, pommel horse, but also on floor exercise. A bronze medal in the showpiece event, the all-around competition behind arguably the greatest men’s gymnast of all time, Japan’s Kohei Uchimura and Ukraine’s Oleg Verniaiev added to the Brit’s legend.

This time, a little older and wiser, a three-month recovery period followed, with Whitlock waiting until he was itching to get back to the gym to return.

Tokyo 2020 was much, much different. The COVID-19 pandemic had delayed the Games by a year, and no spectators were allowed. Furthermore, pressure ratcheted up on the Olympic champion, as expectations from media and public back home increased. Nevertheless, Whitlock retained his pommel horse title, and for the first three months post Tokyo, was loving life and enjoying freedom away from the gym.

Low period

Whitlock's mindset started to change, however, as he reflected on his 22 years in the sport. Previously he’d always wanted to carry on as long as he possibly could, but all of a sudden, that changed. He wanted to stop.

“I felt like I had a lot on my shoulders, and I almost started to fear failure in terms of moving forwards and I think that's what switched my mindset to think, you know what, I'm almost feeling slightly content with what I've done, I'm finished.”

After telling those closest to him that he was finished with the sport, Whitlock really began to struggle.

“I started to go downhill. Just completely wasn't myself at all, day to day, just feeling fatigued, like I was just moping around, not doing anything and that's so unlike me, it's unbelievable.”

Initially, he couldn’t articulate how he was feeling to those closest to him, let alone find a way forward. How could he fix himself if he couldn’t even explain what was wrong?

“I remember just sitting on the sofa and just literally I couldn't explain how I was feeling at all. I couldn't even put into words because I couldn't even comprehend or understand my thoughts in my own head.”

Concern about the impact on his young daughter, who is four next week, was also paramount.

“I tried to keep Willow out of that stuff because obviously I wasn't feeling too great, and I didn't want that to rub off on Willow at all. That was really important to me.”

Conversations with his wife Leah, his parents and family, “were huge”, says Whitlock now.

“We just tried to frame some ideas, tried to figure out the reasons why, and I’m trying to figure out how to start feeling better. What do I want to do? Just asking loads questions and seeing how I feel about those.”

Initially, any mention of returning to the gym would be deflected.

“I'd just bat it away straight away and say, no, I'm done, I'm not going back. And then I'd slowly start having more conversations and start talking about the pros that, ‘if I did come back…’, and I think that was telling me something.”

Once those thoughts of heading back to the gym started to surface, Whitlock felt a shift until a number of factors prompted the return, and a bid for Paris 2024.

“When I made the decision to come back, there was a year and a half to Paris, and in 10, 20 years’ time would I regret [not even trying]? One hundred per cent. That is such a small time frame when you look at the bigger picture.”

Additionally, the hope is for a return to the Games complete with cheering crowds and support for athletes, with friends and family in the stands.

“I'd love for Paris to be an opportunity for everyone to come and have an Olympics again, and I'd love to be there… and I think with it being round the corner helps. I just can't wait. I think Paris will be incredible. I think it'll be amazing to be so close to home will be an experience, not to miss out on.”

What’s next for Max Whitlock?

First up, a low-key return at the Scottish Championships on Sat 18 and 19 February, followed by the English Championships the following weekend from 24-26 February.

The British Championships then follows 23-26 March, with Whitlock hoping results are good enough to put him in the mix for selection for the European Championships in Antalya, Turkey from 11-16 April 2023, currently going ahead as planned in cooperation with the Turkish Gymnastics Federation despite the devastating earthquake in early February.

• How to qualify for Paris 2024 in artistic gymnastics

Great Britain have already qualified five quota places for Paris 2024 courtesy of coming in the top three in the team competition at the World Championships in Liverpool in November 2022. The women claimed an almighty second place behind the United States and ahead of Canada, who also qualify for Paris, while GB’s men bagged an incredible bronze and book their tickets to France alongside first-placed People’s Republic of China and silver medallists, Japan.

The GB team won’t be decided until a month or so before the Games so it’s early days as Whitlock feels his way back into the gymnastics groove. Should the now 30-year-old claim a medal on pommel horse in Paris, Whitlock will make Olympic history as the first gymnast to claim four medals on the same piece of apparatus. A record not lost on Whitlock, but one that needs parking right now as he just enjoys the journey of returning to his beloved sport.