Zainab Alema: The Black Muslim mother of three smashing stereotypes in rugby

"Rugby is a man’s sport. Rugby is an elite sport. Why do you want to play rugby? Why don't you play tennis?"

That was what the father of Zainab Alema, a British-Ghanaian Muslim, told her after she said she had fallen in love with the game.

Now 30, 'Zee' is a mother of three and quit her job as a neonatal nurse in 2021 to follow her dream of wearing a hijab under an England rugby kit.

She told Olympics.com, "I quit nursing… I made the decision to embark on a journey to become the first Black Muslim woman to play for England."

Having acquired the nickname 'Bulldozer' early in her rugby career, Alema is living up to that billing on and off the pitch.

"Being a Black Muslim woman in rugby, I'm smashing stereotypes and breaking those barriers. And if you look at it deeply, nobody expects a nurse to be playing rugby. Nobody expects a mother-of-three to be playing rugby. Nobody expects a career woman to be playing rugby.

"I'm smashing these stereotypes as a bulldozer would smash buildings on a site."

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Zainab Alema's introduction to rugby

The West Londoner first played rugby at 14 thanks to one of her secondary school teachers, and was instantly hooked.

“I just fell in love with it… holding the ball and running was amazing. I loved the physicality of it,” Alema said of her early rugby days when she would commute from the family's council home in Shepherds Bush to train with the U18s at Ealing Trailfinders.

“I used to get called 'a beast' which is not nice for a teenager. Body image was obviously a big thing at that age, but it’s something I never internalised. But it's funny because now if you call me a beast, I love it because that's the nature of a rugby player. To be called a beast, that’s the best compliment you can give a rugby player.”

Settling into the game was far from straightforward for a Muslim girl who needed to maintain her modesty to comply with religious and cultural expectations. But things became easier after she won over her father.

“He never said, 'No'. He just didn’t understand why his Muslim girl wanted to play rugby.

“But when I look back, I think the reason why he said I should play tennis was because of Serena Williams because there wasn’t that representation in rugby, and tennis is a non-contact sport. But he knew the passion I had for it and the fact that I stuck with it and I didn't compromise my values, he ended up being really proud. Now, he literally tells everybody that I play rugby.”

Zainab Alema on juggling rugby and a career in nursing

Having been born very prematurely, and after her mother told her about the nurses and doctors who looked after her, Alema knew "from a very young age" that she wanted to go into nursing and specifically neonatal medicine.

When she went to University of Hertfordshire, she was able to play rugby alongside her studies. But she struggled to fit in.

"Initially I didn’t notice it until when I was at university that, 'Wait, I am the only Muslim girl on my team. I'm the only Black girl on my team. I'm different.'

"Before then, I was just playing for fun. I didn't know how to behave. I didn't know how to navigate myself within that a space, then on top of that, clothing… wearing a headscarf and covering my arms and all that kind of stuff,” she explained.

Her faith also meant she could not join in with the alcohol-fuelled high jinks often associated with the sport. 

"We used to have the player of the match and I used to get that nomination quite a bit at the university. But that would mean I would have to down a pint of alcohol. I would get up, and I'm like, ‘I can't drink this!’ And then I'd have to nominate someone else… it just became a bit awkward and embarrassing."

But playing at university brought her great satisfaction and the confidence to progress further in the sport.

She found her place at Millwall Venus in East London, and settled into her position as a back row forward charged with carrying the ball at opposing defenders and breaking through tackles.

Zainab Alema – The bulldozer smashing stereotypes

Playing for Millwall Venus in the Women’s National Championship second division is where she earned a nickname that has come to define her style of play and her rugby spirit – the bulldozer.

"It's more than just the smashing, it’s about paving the way for something better just as a bulldozer would in a construction site,” said Alema.

“I am hoping that being a bulldozer in a rugby space is inspiring and obviously paving the way for others. You can be a bulldozer. You've just got to be brave, be bold and be yourself.

“I remember people used to ask me, 'How can you be a nurse and be a rugby player?' I didn’t go around tackling babies,” she joked.

"The values of rugby are respect, discipline, and in the nursing industry you have to be respectful, be discipline like with time management. There are a lot of transferable skills."

Away from the pitch, Alema was married a year after completing university and started a family.

But rugby remained a constant and something she feels defines her as a human being.

“With motherhood, sometimes it can consume you in the sense that you are looking after these young, tiny humans, and they rely on you wholeheartedly - that you have to change them, feed them, everything of your being is focussed on them. And it got to a point where I kind of felt like I was losing myself as a person. My identity. Rugby was that thing that gave me my identity back.”

After a traumatic delivery of her third child, she was readmitted to hospital following post-birth complications. Yet eight weeks post-partum, Alema was keen to get back into her rugby routine.

“I was still feeling that sense of losing myself, and I was like, ‘I’m going to get my identity back!’

“When I look back, it wasn’t the best decision, but I signed up to go to county trials, Middlesex County. I put my daughter in the car seat and got one of my sisters to come with me. I remember the reactions of some of the players, 'Why is there a baby in the changing room?' but I didn’t care. So I breastfed her and did my session.

“Before we even finished the warm-up, I was like, 'I can’t do this.' I was unfit, my body wasn’t ready, my pelvis wasn’t even intact. I was still upset I didn’t get to the squad.

"I tried again the following season, and I got in."

Making the move to focus on rugby

In 2021, she decided to take a break from her nursing career - not because she was struggling with work-life balance, but to focus more on her game.

Rugby was helping her and others in so many ways.

“It was the hardest decision I ever had to make in my life, stepping into the unknown. But I don’t regret it all, I feel much more content.

"If I'm not taking care of myself, how can I take care of my kids? I don't feel guilty because I always feel like I can't pour from an empty cup. I need to make sure I'm good physically, mentally, in order to take care of them and to be the best mother I can. So rugby does that for me.

“In rugby, you're not a professional until you reach the top. Nursing was my comfort zone, the stability and knowing at the end of the month I’ll get money.

“I just thought rugby was going well, not necessarily the playing, the influence. I felt what I was making in rugby was getting bigger. I've had numerous people telling me, ‘I'm an inspiration to them,' or they've ended up playing rugby because of me and this is exactly what I wanted."

Zainab Alema on taking the next leap and perhaps making history

Alema is still an amateur and currently plays for Richmond Women in Championship South I, one rung below the elite Premier 15s.

Situated just a couple of kilometres from Twickenham, the home of England Rugby, the trailblazer has often thought of what it would be like to run out onto the hallowed turf.

She moved position - from the back row to the front row where she now operates as a tight-head prop - to try and maximise her chances of playing for England.

While she is still learning the 'dark arts' of the front row, her game is steadily maturing and pre-season training with top-flight side Wasps last year helped accelerate that process.

Inspired by the success of one of English rugby's torchbearers, Maggie Alphonsi, Alema decided to throw it out there that her dream would be to play more competitive rugby and represent her country.

Alema said, "Some people ask me, ‘Don’t you feel pressured?’ Because I put it out there, and I've told the world that it's what I want to do. But for me, the reason why I'm doing it is because I want people to be inspired and to feel like they can also achieve their goals. And it doesn't have to be anything within rugby or even within sport."

With her hijab underneath her rugby jersey, Alema sees her differences from other rugby players as a plus point and inspiration.

"I know I am unique and when you are unique, people are curious, interested," she says. "I don't see it as a negative. I see it as a superpower. Because if I was White, I'd just blend in.

"I don't think I've faced any sort of outright racism. People are just a bit more intrigued and interested in me and Richmond is the most diverse club I've been at. We've got a black coach and several black and ethnic minority players. Long gone are the days where I was the only black person to play.

"When I step into the rugby space, people are like, ‘Who is this? She’s wearing a scarf…' I do stand out, and I feel like that motivates me to play better.

Four years ago, Alema founded a grassroots project, Studs in the Mud, to raise money for rugby equipment and to encourage access to the game for girls and children in Ghana.

She hopes that rugby can have a similar impact on Ghanaian children's lives as it had on her.